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Grief, two years in

Marie 54yo, Hospice social worker

DepressionGrief

Three years

Grief did not get smaller. My life got bigger around it.

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Grief, two years in

141 words

Life before I started

My husband died in 2022 after a short illness. I was fifty-four.

What I was experiencing

Numbness first, then a flatness that everyone kept calling depression and that did not respond like depression.

What I'd tried before

Grief counselling, a widows' group I hated, and staying extremely busy.

What I explored

A different grief group that fit, walking every single morning, cooking properly again, and a meditation course.

What happened

The morning walk was the only thing I managed in the first six months and it turned out to be enough of a thread.

What surprised me most

How physical it was. My whole body hurt.

What didn't help

Being busy. It just delayed everything.

What I'm still working through

Anniversaries and small ordinary things, like his handwriting on a list.

What I learned about myself

That grief is not a problem to be solved and treating it as one made it worse.

Where I am now

Living. Genuinely, on most days.

What I'd tell someone starting out

You do not have to do anything impressive. Walk. Eat. Ring one person.

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